stream of consciousness

Flashback in the Pan

Dec. 27, 2006 The ferment forms eyes, which turn upon the ferment, in wonder. I am rising into the atmosphere, looking down upon the earth. Time is accelerating, the earth spinning so fast I can no longer make out its surface. Higher and higher I go into outer space. Momentary flashing irregular pauses reveal successiveContinue reading “Flashback in the Pan”

Saturday Sermon

No Exit (originally published on Dec 11, 2007)Now that all the groups have disappeared, and every tribe has dispersed, we know ourselves as isolated but similar to each other, and we have lost the desire to unite.—The Possibility of an Island, Michel Houellebecq Reality is the only word in the English language that should always comeContinue reading “Saturday Sermon”

The Carrot and the Stick All of these fatigued and serious faces showed no evidence of despair…they made their way with the resigned expression of those who are condemned to hope forever.–Charles Baudelaire, To Each His Own Chimera Human beings are, necessarily, actors who…can be divided…into the sane who know they are acting and theContinue reading

Cadence Song

Me? I hope to go out singing, defiantly. Like DeNiro’s redneck Nemesis in Cape Fear, warbling in tongues as the rising tide consumes him. I want to play myself over this way, a segue between shows, until the dirty water fills my lungs. It’s not bravery, it’s denial; and denial gets a bad rap. DenialContinue reading “Cadence Song”

Possession

I confess I’ve never been overtaken entirely by passion. I’ve never given myself over unconditionally and without reservation to anything; neither joy nor grief, hate nor love. Likewise for any given idea; but this is just another way of saying the same thing, for the passions are ideas too. The purest ideas, confounding transposition intoContinue reading “Possession”

cowardice

This is a little embarrassing. I thought I might write my way out of here. Setting messages in virtual bottles adrift in the electronic ether. Someone would find one, send out a search party. I would finally join society, whatever that meant. I had an idea of what it was, gleaned from a lifetime ofContinue reading “cowardice”

Commutation

People are afraid to merge…—Less Than Zero, Bret Easton Ellis There is not room enough. Not for everyone. The passage is insufficient for the mass of humanity bearing down upon it. Audacity and nerve will determine who passes ahead and who languishes behind; an instant hierarchy of the quick and the rude. Deference risks humiliation.Continue reading “Commutation”